- Montreal is just Paris with potholes and worse attitudes.
- Everyone here is bilingual — and still rude.
- Montreal dating is just arguing over who has better wine taste.
- The city smells like bagels, stinky poutine, and existential dread.
- Montrealers are so cultured they judge your coffee before your soul.
- Everyone here complains about winter but secretly loves snowstorms.
- Montreal nightlife peaks when someone yells “c’est la vie!”
- The city has more cafes than traffic lights.
- Montreal is proof croissants can’t fix broken people.
- Everyone brags about their borough but secretly hates everyone else.
- Montreal dating apps are just selfies with smoked meat sandwiches.
- People here peak emotionally at 3 a.m. in a nightclub.
- Montreal winters are long, cold, and judgmental.
- Everyone thinks they’re edgy until someone mentions Toronto.
- Montrealers argue about bagels like it’s a war crime.
- The city runs on espresso, cigarettes, and passive-aggressive charm.
- Montreal traffic is just a way to test your patience… and sanity.
- Everyone is either in a band or wishes they were.
- Montreal thinks it’s romantic — until your Uber gets stuck in snow.
- Everyone loves poutine until the heart attack arrives.
- Montreal has more festivals than sleep.
- People here will lecture you on art, then yell at you for stepping on the sidewalk.
- Montreal dating is arguing over who’s “more Quebecois.”
- The city smells like smoked meat and broken dreams.
- Montreal thinks it’s edgy — really, it’s just cold and cranky.
- Everyone has an opinion on wine, cheese, and your relationship.
- Montreal winters make people sarcastic and beautiful.
- Everyone brags about their terrace view — until it snows.
- Montreal nightlife is basically rooftop bars in winter with existential angst.
- Everyone’s “working on themselves” but drinking too much wine.
- Montreal is where culture meets chaos, and chaos wins.
- Everyone pretends French is sexy on dating apps — it isn’t.
- Montreal drivers peak at yelling at cyclists.
- The city is loud, proud, and often drunk.
- Montreal has more hipsters than warm coats.
- Everyone loves Montreal until they have to shovel it.
- Montreal is a city that apologizes sarcastically.
- Everyone argues about hockey, hockey, and Montreal hockey.
- Montreal is proof coffee keeps people from murdering each other.
- The city has more murals than common sense.
- Everyone thinks poutine is a personality trait.
- Montrealers peak emotionally when bagels aren’t toasted correctly.
- The city is charming if you enjoy being slightly offended.
- Montreal nightlife ends when someone spills wine on an art student.
